A mutual friend just introduced me to Jon Houghton, owner/manager of Maplehurst Florist. They’re a third generation family business in Essex Junction, Vermont.

That’s one of the great things about living in this tiny-yet-vibrant community.  Everyone is interconnected, and the lion’s share of the businesses are home grown. Which means that when you get married in Vermont – whether or not you’re from here to begin with – you’re doing an enormous amount of good for the local economy.

Vermont works hard to keep operating on a human scale, and our small businesses are a huge part of the puzzle.

So if you pass through Essex Junction, stop in and visit Jon – and tell him I said hi.

Fiori Bridal just posted a terrific blog post about ways to mix up what your bridesmaids wear, and finding ways to balance elegance and variety.  You should just click this link and go read the whole thing, but here are a few more pix for your viewing pleasure…

Heather and Robin - Photo by Karen Pike

While scientists tell us that Nature abhors a vacuum, what they’re less likely to reveal is that Nature loves Love.  I perform a large number of outdoor weddings, and even in a place as climatically dynamic as Vermont, the weather almost always cooperates in support of a wedding ceremony.  Hot days cool off a bit.  Bad weather restrains itself while vows are being vowed.  Even chilly mid-winter weddings seem to bite with a softer set of teeth.

Nowhere, though, is this more evident than in the supportive response of the animal kingdom.  While I’ve seen rambunctious pet dogs quiet down as couples walk down the aisle, and highly picturesque flocks of geese soar overhead just as a couple says, “I do,” my favorite instances of “nonhuman participation” have come when animals insert themselves directly into the ceremony.

Michael and Robert had come all the way from Michigan to get married at Comstock House, a little B&B in rural Plainfield, Vermont.  They’d already constructed a moving ceremony in which they scattered flowers and planted seeds, honoring their love, their ancestors, and the beauty of their surroundings.

But then Robert was in the middle of saying his vows to Michael, and talking about how kind and gentle and giving Michael is, when a giant, iridescent green dragonfly circled around them and landed on Michael’s arm.  They both smiled at it briefly, then continued on with the ceremony.

Apparently not content with the amount of Attention Paid, the dragonfly took off, circled them again, and then landed right on the tip of Michael’s nose.  Michael took a long, cross-eyed look at this gorgeous insect, and said to Robert, “It’s busy eating a fly.  I don’t want to bother it.  You can just keep going.”  Thereby proving Robert’s point about his sweet and generous personality.

Just a couple weeks later, I joined Heather and Robin for their ceremony at Fielder Farm in Huntington, Vermont.  Of all the stunningly beautiful places I’ve performed ceremonies, Fielder Farm, with its long, sloping hills and foot-of-the-mountain views of Camel’s Hump, has got to take the proverbial cake.

Heather and Robin had decided to climb to the top of a long meadow, and have their ceremony on a gorgeous little plateau overlooking the valley.  As it happened, that meadow was more than just a spot with a nice view; it was the stomping ground of a small herd of Jersey cows.  With caramel-colored coats, giant eyes, and big batty eyelashes, Jerseys are sort of the porn stars of the Bovine World–not to mention being highly attentive wedding guests!

As we laid out the handmade quilt where the gals would stand for the ceremony, the entire herd strolled over and gathered around the brides in a perfect semi-circle, getting as close as they could without being rude or disruptive–or evacuating anything unpleasant.  Jerseys, apparently, have a well-developed sense of decorum.

They stuck around for the full ceremony, joined Robin and Heather for the bulk of their photo shoot, and then, just as things were wrapping up, took their cue and nonchalantly strolled away.  They couldn’t have been better guests if they’d been hired!

The Vermont Tourism Bureau doesn’t guarantee the appearance of such dramatically accommodating creatures, but if you’re getting married in the Green Mountain State, it’s worth preparing to be pleasantly surprised!

And nowhere is that more true than in the Gay Wedding Community.  And it’s extremely important to me to be able to serve the cause of social justice – all while I’m serving the cause of Love.

One of the nicest people I’ve run into is Britt Jamrock from the website Engayged Weddings. EW is an on-line resource for helping plan gay weddings, and Britt has been incredibly helpful in getting me set up a profile on the site.  This morning she emailed me to let me know I’d been featured on the site.  And indeed, the slideshow on the home page has photos of three different weddings at which I’ve officiated.

I can’t thank her enough for her generosity in promoting my work.  It is indeed an honor to marry folks who can’t marry elsewhere. There’s a part of me which, while performing a wedding ceremony for a gay couple, always feels like I’m giving Texas the finger.  Not a very mature or holy attitude, I know.  But still pretty satisfying.

I look forward, eagerly, to the day when this is a non issue; to the day when people are just people, and we don’t have to fight to treat them that way.  But until then, I’m in the fray, fighting my part of the fight with words and rings and flowers and kisses and joyous celebrations.

"We can't even begin to express our gratitude for the MOST beautiful marriage ceremony!! We were blown away on how connected we were to the words you spoke. It was just perfect!!! It wasn't about the guests, the flowers, the food or what we were wearing. It was truly about our abundant love for one another. Just perfect." - Ellie and Ben

I just got an update on Ellie and Ben!  Turns out they left for the hospital 30 minutes after the ceremony, and 11 hours later, welcomed Miss Aspen Rebecca Hayes into the world.

She is, I’m told, “Cute as a button.”  But don’t take my word for it.  See for yourself:

Welcome Aspen!  So glad you could join us!  We hope you enjoy your stay!

I’ll add the photo from the actual wedding when Ellie’s sister sends it along.  But this was just so funny I wanted to write about it right away.

So, yesterday afternoon, I went over to the little hamlet of St. George, VT to perform a kitchen wedding for Ellie and Ben.

They’d met while working at Burton Snowboards, are madly in love, and Ben has a beautiful relationship with Ellie’s 7 year old son Keane.

They were very excited to get married – and a little pressed for time, as Ellie is about 11 months pregnant.  Just kidding.  But she is really, really, really pregnant.  In fact, as of this writing, she might not be pregnant anymore!

Yup, as Ellie and Ben moved to the spot in the kitchen where he’d proposed, Keane perched on a stool, Ellie’s mom and sister gathered round, and Ben’s parents joined in on Skype, Ellie announced that she was having serious contractions, and wasn’t going to be able to stand up for much longer, so we better get on with it!

This might explain why there was so much crying…

But what a post-post-modern wedding!  From the rapid bridal dilation to the parental techno-participation, to the fact that Ben read his vows off his iPhone, this was definitely a ceremony to remember.

They’ll be re-hitching up in October with a big, fancy party-style wedding, but it’s hard to imagine anything topping this!

Erin and Sinan got married on one of those perfect Vermont fall days when the sky is as blue as a sky can be, the air is crisp and cool, and the trees are an utter riot of colors which, if used to decorate your kitchen, would be painfully garish, but out in nature does an awful lot of taking of breath – i.e. GORGEOUS!

They were married on the Middlebury Town Green – proof positive that you don’t need to spend a gazillion dollars on a fancy wedding venue.  A few artfully placed pumpkins and mums can pretty much do the trick. Though they did have to push the wedding from 4 to 4:30 so that the previous event – a pig roast – could get cleaned up.  This was doubly important because Sinan is Turkish, and Muslims tend not to go in for pork products.

I had to modify the repeat-after-me vow section, as Sinan’s English is a little rugged, and I can be, admittedly, a little fancy-pants in my writing style.  But I slowed way down in the delivery, knocked it back to a few words at a time, left out as much extraneous verbiage as possible, and, so far as we can tell, still managed to get Sinan promising enough to make it sound like actual marriage vows.

Then, after the ceremony and big group shot, I was heading back to my car, when I saw one of the women from the inn where they were staying peering intently at the ground. Apparently, Erin’s Maid of Honor had dropped her ring on the way to the Green and nobody could find it!  I have no idea whose ring the little Ring Dudes brought to the altar, but Mystery Donor gets double-dog thanks for helping keep Crisis at bay.

I got the sweetest thank-you note from Kristen and Justin, who got married in a lovely lakeside ceremony in upstate New York (yes, I do cross the border sometimes!).

Thank you once again for making our ceremony perfect.  It was the most accurate description of Justin and me.  It brought out many different emotions from not only us but our families too.  Everyone was crying at one point, even Justin’s dad :)  We cannot thank you enough for the beautiful job you did for us.  I wish you could have stayed a bit longer to celebrate!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

-Justin and Kristen Delisle

I really have to thank them back for sharing as much of themselves with me as they did, and for being willing to have both poignancy, romance, and humor in the ceremony.

And in case you’re wondering what poignancy, romance, and humor actually look like in action, here’s an excerpt from their ceremony:

You know the ease with which you communicate and share and engage with the world, and the huge amount of trust and respect which you bring to your partnership.  Well, trust and respect, but also pizza, chicken wings, Chinese and ice cream.  Proof positive that you are, indeed, the male and female versions of exactly the same person.

You also know exactly how much you adore each other.  Kristen, you know Justin loves your personality, and how much fun you are to be around, and really, he loves pretty much everything about you.  Justin, you know Kristen thinks you’re the most caring man she’s ever met, and that she relishes your generosity, your work ethic, and your mere presence, which gives her so much comfort.  You also have no idea how fortunate you are to have found a woman to whom you can communicate the power of your feelings through a judicious and masterful use of greeting cards.  Once again, proof positive that you are the same person.

They’re a totally delightful couple, and I wish them all the best!

We were at Mills Riverside Park in Jericho, Vermont waiting for Ethan and Alicia to arrive. Well, actually, Ethan was already there. We were really waiting for Alicia to arrive. But I never like to blame the bride.

Anyway, the band played for a while before things got rolling, with a lovely set that included some of my favorite Sing-along-ables, including One Love, One Heart and Here Comes the Sun.

Much as I was enjoying the concert, this little guy was utterly into it.  He stood there, as documented in this photo, staring at the musicians, for a good 20 minutes until his mom had to pick him up because Alicia was about to walk down the aisle.

I would give a serious chunk of change to be able to travel into the future and see whether or not this micro-dude becomes a rock star.

A wedding should be a celebration that fits the people getting married and you really helped us achieve that. It has been a joy working with you. - Deanna and Guy

Guy and Deanna came all the way from St. Louis to get married at a rented farmhouse in beautiful Craftsbury, Vermont.  They had about 10 friends and family there with them, and we did the ceremony out underneath a couple of old apple trees called “The Married Couple” by the owners of the farmhouse.

At the end of the ceremony, Deanna and Guy handed out little books called Until Bananas Turn To Ink.  It’s a love poem written by William M. Perry for his wife and runs along the lines of:

Until bananas turn to ink
I’ll keep you in my heart.
Till helium begins to sink
I’ll hope we never part.
Until pillows grow on trees
And the ocean turns to glue
And polar bears raise honeybees
I always will love you.

It’s very sweet and whimsical, and the entire assembled gang read it out loud, each person taking a line.  It was a terrific moment of easy group participation, and highly recommended for anyone looking to get their wedding guests more involved in the ceremony.